Archive for the lolwut Category

hang up and drive. or park. or drive. or park.

Posted in crazies, lolwut on October 4, 2009 by sarafist

I’ve been watching some guy drive through our parking lot for twenty minutes now.

He went through at that slow drift speed you get in an automatic when you’re not actually accelerating. Then he stopped and sat for a minute. Then he drove forward a few feet and stopped again. Then he reversed twenty-five feet and parked in a space for a minute and a half. He pulled out and drifted forward toward the exit, stopping every few feet. Just when I thought he was about to leave, he slowly reversed again and sat. Then he reversed farther and sat again. Then he pulled forward and sat, drifitng a few feet farther every two or three minutes. He is about six feet from the driveway now.

He’s been on his phone the whole fucking time.

If there were a little girl on a bicycle in the driveway, it’d be just like that drug PSA.

the what now?

Posted in check-ins, lolwut on July 8, 2009 by sarafist

Some superdrunk lady I was checking in kept laughing and telling me that I’m the “white Tyler Perry.”

I have no idea where she was getting that–something about the way I talk?–but she was having a grand old time.